Jago BIMARU Jago...

Another sobering News !!!

BIMARU states finally losing sheen to the progressive states of West n South in Gross Corruption Index too ... Lalujee could not able to think beyond Fodder for Scam , Behan jee has a limited appetite : she gets happy with garlands of thousand Rs Notes n few statues here n there. Poor Mulayam Uncle never got his opportunity as Amar Singh held sway in all deals . Comrades in West Bengal are the holy cows : they get satisfied with peanuts by collecting their paltry Chandas and Mamta Di only knows how to distribute freebies. Surely!! Madhu Koda did play a little cameo to bring the glory back to BIMARU states but he stilll fell way behind to reach the Hall of Fame...Our leadership failed to lead the corrupt pawns by example. Slowly but surely, the movemnet of scaling up the instituionalism of corruption has met its untimely death here...However audacious were our leaders of North in their swindle act, the Transpareny International never moved India below its 84 th position among all the nations in World. Communists accuse IMF n World Bank for this biased treatment to our hard-working leaders of North India. Any ways, it is also a matter of probe for Lokpal ..will discuss it some time else. Let them first figure out if ShantiBhushan n his son are Corrupts of first degree of not....

The fact of matter is that the entrepreurship wave in South n West has finally taken a unassailable lead in the race from the BIMARUs. The Sons of Soils Kalmadi, Powar , Raja n Reddy have suddenly raised the bar to such level that BIMARU states now need " Reservation to Scam" to match their counterparts down the plains of Ganges.... Or do we need more coaching institutes like "Super Achievers " in Patna, Lucknow , Bhopal and Kolkata to reinvigorate these "Arts of spinning ". Is Brain drain responsbile for BIMARU states's failure to match the expectations ....There are also murmurs going round that a scam cartel systemically had kept all our wannabe "Buccaneers from North" at cold storage and distributed all "Scam worthy" departments among themselves... there are so many painful questions ....

Hope someone rises from BIMARUs to bring the mantle back to its rightful owners...Let one " Ghotala ka Maha Bap" unearth from the land of Lalus , Mayawati or Mamta n give all those late bloomers run for their money in Con Man ship....Is Manmohan Singh listening ? Can his sleight of hand do something for us ??? Rahul Baba !! Please respond....

Let there be a renaissance !!! Let Buddha Smile !!!

The curious case of two legends ...

Now, this surely is a curious case of trying to find strands of differences in seemingly similar stories of two living legends of our times , who built insitituions for the masses from their sheer dream, got worldwide recogntion for offering alternate way of wealth creation at BoP and finally have to exit from their own insitituions in most unceremonious ways.

In the hindsight, the story of Dr. Kurien and Dr. Yunus offers interesting insights into the minds of two great visionaries and leaves you with some clues to their own ways of "Instituion building", which were so aptly sucessful for their respective models. Ironically , both of them fell to those very strengths , which they so assidioulsy nurtured all through their lives as building blocks for their dreams

Since begining , both of them seems to have realised that co-option of governments is the best way to sustain and scale up their respective endeavours to reach a critical size . While, Dr. Kurien did not hesitate to take government help in the form of grants and access to technical knowhow , he ensured that the Amul Movement also grows as a very strong people based organisation and never gave space to governments to interfere wid Amul. Rather, he went one step ahead and helped Government to replicate AMUL models in various parts of country through creating another exemplary instituition like NDDB. That indeed was a master stroke- Governments also got their own AMULS models across India n Kurien's AMUL thrived under the leadership of Dr. Kurien.Simirarly, Dr. Yunus too pursuaded the Bangladesh Government to specifically draft a central law ( We In India only have State Bank of India, which runs under a similar kind of central legislation) to convert Grameen as Bank with some truly phenomenal privelages , off course he paid through his nose by allowing Government to have a stake in the Grameen Bank. The strong member based patronage coupled with professional management at the helms catapulted AMUL to World's largest producer of milk , while the Government's strong support in terms of funding n legal statute made Grameen World's largest Microfinance provider with varied range of product offering. Dr. Yunus and Grameen Bank got Noble Prize for peace. Quite a story- leveraging people's movement and government's support to build people based organisation in the two most backward third world countries with different approaches to doing balancing act between People's ownership n Government's co-option.

Unfortunately as unexpected turn of events , the representatives of same people basesd societies said "No" to the leadership of Kurien and Government could anything but intervene with a refrain that it was an internal matter of a Member based Organisation. On the other hand, Dr. Yunus ended up giving Government too much of discretionary power that people's confidence to let him lead Grameen Bank was made totally redundant by the same Government. And , he got a notice from the Government to leave the office for most lame reasons....On the second guess, one could also speculate did they outlived their utility for their "folks" who were ready to step into their shoes.

In retrospect, we could argue that both of them could have done things a little differently but wasn't that the the best chances both of them had taken, when they did not have anythiing except their grit to realise those "disturbing" dreams ..

A Devil's Advocate's Babble ... Hope it makes sense...

Surprise Surprise !!! Yeah!! U heard it right …. We also have an empowered group of ministers on corruption. Going by the log books of North Block, little bird says that this GoM is the most active among all “sundry and all” committees of “Aaam admi” government busy in “Bharat Nirman”. Thanks to CWG, 2G, Adarsha Housing, ISRO, CVC, Black money scams, this committee got full 100 days work on a trot in last three months… “Jai ho” for the National Employment Guarantee Scheme of Respected Prime Minister, like other millions of poorest, these ministers are also getting their daily per diem without any delay and off course without any CUT to attend these committees. In the mean time, PM is so assured with this GoM that he just closed his eyes from all wordly pittance like accountability, self respect, morality and doing his deep meditation burying his head into deep shit…proverbial sand seems to be not enough for testing his perseverance or save him from the blushes…After all ,Sonia Jee is so happy at her protégé superlative performance …India has arrived on world stage.... Its no mean feat that the Swiss bank accounts are flush with Indian rupees only…Even,Italy is celebrating their daugheter's great achievement with Bunga Bunga parties. The whiff of pride is just everywhere..

N what did this empowered group of ministers on corruption did in last three months: They bullied , they flexed their muscles and they tore apart any reasonable page from rule books of running government ( read constitution)….They shut the Parliament and made sure that disgruntled opposition does not get opportunity to heckle their high performing ministers , they questioned CAG saying that its calculation on 2G is blatantly erroneous and speculative , they raised eye brows on Supreme Court’s decision to directly supervise CBI and last but not the least : it was the master stroke among all - they put an experienced “ Charge sheeted” CVC with an impeccable track record in public service to fight the battle of corruption to each nook and cranny of country . Yes, Off course, whenever Rahul Baba returns to 10 Janpath from his sojourns after having his dinner at Dalit, Kisan or a Majdoor’s Jhopdis , they even did have to flock together for Rahul Baba’s philosophical discourse on Nation building …


Isn’t harsh if this empowered group of ministers is working so hard on multifarious issues of corruption , how can we expect the Foreign minister not dozing off at UN summit and then innocently read some one’s else speech, Agriculture Minister having no clue why onion and milk prices are sky rocketing. Forget about them, one should actually pity ministers like our environment minister … poor fellow did not know when did they construct that 33 story building without his clearance. He could have also got one flat allotted on his grand son’s name. The home minister just having a memory loss that we did have 26 11 some time back and Kasab is still enjoying his “pink health” with Incredible India’s hospitality ….Examples are galore...These are just few shining examples to drive home the point...

On a serious note, let us not poke fun on our already hard-pressed but untiring and conscientious leaders …. Believe me we are at the safe hands … Countries like .Egypt, Yeman and Tunisia come and go…India would continue to shine with such unassuming and selfless leadership …. Thank God!! We hardly need any Tahrir Squares in India…

All is well here ...

Valentine Expose: Ek Hariya ki Amar Prem Kahani ...

Based on True story :

Days back it all started : Around 10.15 pm at Nite on Facebook

Hariya has been doing his usual FB profile jumping from one account to other. After frentic half an hour of absolute rioting on facebook, he suddenly stops at one profile, takes a long pause and pumps lot of fresh air into his heart. He has been religiously visiting this profile and tracking her each move. He closes his eyes for a second. He knows that this is it. Assured personified, he leaves a comment on one of the pictures in that profile, which was uploaded some three months back.


Hariya : gud pose...i thnk th photographer is quite talented to capture the moment.


Reply comes the next evening…

Lady : XXX...Thanks for the photograph.....

Hariya has already seen the comment on the very evening but waits for the rite moment. He replies next day at mid nite…


Hariya : Nythng for u madame'


Lady sees the comment next evening and rallies next question back to Hariya …She also seems to be game for "It" at least for a moment.


Lady: XXX.....can u explain me what do u mean by anything????


The very next second, Answer comes from Hariya’s Blackberry… He does not have the luxury to even lose a second now.


Hariya : absolutely nythng madame'.....just ask fr it, u will get it.


Conversation continues with messages getting exchanged thick n fast each second now... Is this "Now or Never" Situation??


Lady: XXX........i'm not be able to understand Sir......Thats why asking...


Now, Hariya grows a little confident and bares it all…


Hariya: under the sky, and under my purview, jo bhi ho, kuch bhi! is it clear nw!

Lady bites her teeth n whispers to hershelf , " I knew your intentions from begining , You Punk "

Lady: hmmmmmm....before going to tell this u should have to think Sir.....Coz u r telling it to a Lady.....

By now, Hariya has already morped into the knight with shinning armour and galloping on the high horses. He proclaims.

Hariya: doesnt matter! i m clear!

Lady is now confused. Things are getting into trickier territory.

Lady: Fir v .....u Should think.


Hariya is now ecstatic and waves after waves of adrenaline are getting pumped into his mind. He has totally gone berserk.

Hariya: soch liya...ab bolo!

Lady: ok...time ane pe bol denge.....

Hariya gets restless now. He tries it for for the last time.

Hariya: plz do.

Lady is still bidding for her time

Lady: I'll definitely do...Sir

And its been now already 12 hours gone past this incident and there is yet no fresh update to this story….

Wo Hariya Kaun tha ? Kya Hariya ki phir se Wat lag gayi… Kya uska chota sa sapna is Valentine Day ke pahle pura ho paega ??

En sawaloin ka jawab kab, kanha our kaise milega ….

No one knows except the God almighty… and he seems to be too busy these days.

Gone with Shopping ...

Plain women take refuge to tears and Bold & Beautiful go shopping. And, what do the dimwit do, they follow ‘em. Ask me and I have a story to tell. Once upon a time, there was a babe, a geek and a shopping plaza. Before I start the story rolling, let me tell you something: I am a person, whose haute couture start at picking up leftovers at season’s sales in those discount stores and then ends up most of time fixing up those scandalous wardrobe malfunctions at the neighbor tailor shops. I am still too unfit for any of that tailor-made branded wear’s meant for a supposedly ultimate man. Back to story: So when she asked me to join her for a shopping binge on that warm and balmy Sunday, I was little shaken up with nervousness crawling under my skin. Should I say a meek “No” and save me from the ignominy of my sheer ignorance of this world of style, oomph, panache and statement that draws those tempting curvatures by playing with only two lines: the plunging necklines and rising hemlines. I was already scoring too low in her guidebook of boys with style, verve, taste, mannerism and sophistication that I could not let this opportunity to go abegging. This was the moment to seize upon and prove myself that I have also ‘arrived’ and ‘come of age’.


And that’s how ,here I was ,standing in front of this shopping plaza , nesting inside it the world of ‘fresh arrivals’,’ season’s offerings’ and so many in your face exotica of never heard –never seen life style brands, accessories and what not. I was little too early at that plaza to measure up the things, soak up any embarrassing surprises and learn to breathe in the air filled with color, gloss, smoke and unfettered display of flesh and money. T O M MY HIL F I G ER, V E R SACHE, GU CCI ……YUVES SAINT LAU RENT , you ask for them and there were all over the place and I was trying hard to read them correctly. “Why don’t they have a easy name… they can make life so easy for people like us..; I was scratching my head after giving up my attempts to sound correct while spelling those names. Who cares, I have not come here for any spelling and diction competition. I combed my hair with my dexterous hands in front of that giant glass screen , I saw her waving her hand in front of a store just opposite to me. “Hell !! No store, they call it boutique, boy… get your act together.. Do not botch it up in the beginning” I scolded myself and strolled past the elevators and reached her mustering all my confidence. “Hey! You are looking not that bad today. I am impressed.” she greeted me with a wry smile. She had already started dropping those bombshells from the word go and I was not at all prepared for this salvo. I was wearing my new denim jeans and t-shirt that I bought some six months back with my three friends in a “’buy two get three” offer. That was the only decently branded pair I had to date and somehow it proved its worth today. I blushed and could only say,” Thanks! You are looking awesome as always.” Lesson 1: A friend with reasonably good experience in this ‘trade’ had taught me this mantra, “Have savory look of connoisseur at them for a second and repeat those words ad verbatim with all the sugar coating of honesty possible.” Girls also know this trick but this is like that biblical rite of passage. You have to do it to set the things on right track. She smiled with approval and said,” Should we go inside now, I am dying to shop.” Like a suave gentleman, I opened the glass door of that boutique for her and let her in. When I was getting into the boutique, I felt as if that mannequin just in front of door was also smiling and saying to me , “ So far so good , Dude… You have been dead right on the coin so far. Keep the good work going.” I threw punches in the air and slowly followed her inside the store.

Now, a wonderland of sorts was waiting inside that boutique for me. Rows after rows, stacks after stacks, lines after lines , there was a new discovery, opening of new reality , a new find and I also met with my own new found incredulity about these changing times. I was as clueless as any another Neanderthal transported by a time machine into the hurly burly of 21st century. Fazed, I looked for her. She was already deep inside the large heap of dresses spread on a large table with a display board, “Flat discount upto 70 per cent”. Lesson 2: Basic instincts remain the same whether it’s a bold diva or dumb geek. The vintage abundance of discount always fares better than the so-little ‘fresh arrivals’ with unreasonably high price tags. I was looking at one bizarre looking piece of linen and wondering whether I could touch or hold that one to decipher that belonged to which family: Sari, suit, jeans, top, kurta ….. Surprisingly, I had a limited vocabulary for these things.” Idiot! What are you doing at that Sarong section? Come here... I have found some thing really interesting.” She was holding something in her hand again, I had never seen before. “This is Gucci Capri in moss green color in my size. I have been looking for a Capri for such a long time. I think, I will definitely buy this one. It will be great with my ash colored Tommy Hilfiger top. Wait here... I am back from the changing room.” She was all over the place. Before I could say anything, she was back again right in front of me wearing that moss green Capri. She was rolling her eyes as if she was testing the ripples waves created by her Capri on my blood levels. Honestly, I did not know a dime how that thing looked at her but I was quite amazed at her mastery to fit herself into that little piece of cloth. She had defiantly taken the notion of ‘slimfit’ into altogether different level. “Are you sure that you are comfortable with this dress and would not be chocking yourself dead.” I had to ask her to make my informed decision before saying anything. She swirled on her toes, grooved a little and spread her both shoulders like a salsa dancer and replied, “I am over the moon.” She was exulting,” I am going to busy matching jewelry, nail paint, sandals and purse. It has to be best collection of my wardrobe.” Her words had such a resounding finality that I could only nod my head. Lesson 3: You are not there to give your opinion on her likings. Just soak yourself at her happiness of buying whatever; she was looking for so many days, months or years. You also have an important role to play. Wait for the opportune time.

We were standing in front of cash counter and it happened like the script my friend had narrated me already last night. Her credit card encountered some glitch and dropped dead. It seemed her happiness was too contagious and had taken a toll on her credit card too. Cashier failed to swipe for the thirteen times, when I prodded him to do it again. Like a knight in shinning armour, I had to loosen my purse strings and pay those Rs.3,999 as hard cash after availing 50 per cent discount and getting 2 per cent cash back on account of her privilege patron membership of the boutique. As per her side of story, she had borrowed it from me and she would repay it soon. Lesson 4: Lend, pay and forget. This is such a small amount for her to even remember and you dare not mention to her again. She would blast the entire mankind for behaving mean by asking for that trifle money from a lady like her.

She was still jumping with joy and flaunting her shopping bag, “I had wonderful shopping in such a dirt cheap price. This is value for money. Hope, you also learn your bit of shopping today. Now, it’s your turn. I am so hungry that I can eat the entire cow. Dear! I am at your disposal and you have to indulge me with the best that is available here as a treat for giving you such a wonderful shopping experience.” Lesson 5: Bold and Beautiful do not only shop, they can also eat the entire cows… beware before venturing with them on any shopping experience.

Lunch Break

By all means, it was like any other normal lunch break at the office café. Before I could slip into one of the chairs around the dining table, most of them had already started preparing to savour another day of gourmand’s delight. I hate to admit but lunches for me are like ghastly reminder that I am still languishing in the dog house. In no time, everyone would have a big spread of plates surrounded by bowls of all sizes and purposes, slowly getting filled up by variety of mouth watering preparations made by their better halves. It’s no secret that tiffin box gives a fair idea of where is the volatile indices of romance in your matrimonial life heading. By that token, it seems all of them were making killings and reaping rich dividends. Pauper me! I can’t even enjoy little happiness from their sufferings at the hands of their so-called better halves. However for me, lunch also had much wider ramifications then just eating and it was more about showing greater skills of buying time in nibbling those two chappatis washed in yellow dal and pretending to listen “all ears” to some of the great discourses going around the table. If lady luck favors, I would not be out of my stock before these people turn into their main course. I looked at Kirti , sitting just opposite to me, animatedly showing everyone the dish she has brought from her house. It seems, she still has hope alive with her culinary skills and done some new experiment again with the recipe she has learnt from some scrappy cooking book. I also helped myself to serve a big chunk of that dish that she has kept on the table for everyone to taste. However; there is no such thing as free lunch in this world and this little crumb had also come with a big price tag. We have to listen to the great story of the preparation of that recipe right from her serendipitous discovery of that cook book from a scrap store to her own innovations in chopping, grinding, marinating, frying and cooling of that final outcome. There was still raging discussion going on to whether that dish was a cake, pastry , pie or just a bread with lot of cheese , butter and sugar. Who cares a damn about the nomenclature , By that time I had taken another round of helping for myself of whatever remained on her plate and gave Kirti a stealing big five. After all, she was my hope of surviving at dinner table a little longer as long as she continues with her struggle with these recipes. For all intent and purposes, we both were fighting our losing battle on the dinner table.


Someone has now switched on the TV and all eyes were glued to the episode of Emotional Atyachar coming on the large flat screen. The bimbo was screaming and haggling her beau , who was caught again with the PYT. I looked around at everyone sitting at the dining table, most of them were jaundice faced and completely breathless watching that guy getting roughed up by his sweet heart. I was clueless what was frightening them: Was it the images that was disturbing them or that sneaking feeling in their mind that they could also be the next one. Someone has truly said, we all come to our senses only when our stomachs are completely filled. With that sumptuous lunch devoured by them, the bitter truth was churning inside them and someone rightly flipped to a news channel giving everyone breather from that sense of déjà vu.
For me , lunch was almost over and I was looking for the sweets to complete the ritual. I glanced through the entire dinner table for the last time. Now, everyone was rushing through their plates. Seema has some gulab jamuns so I stretched myself from my end to her end to pick gulab jamuns from her cup. “Look at you, You look so miserable juggling from one plate to another ”; those words hit me like ear splattering bombs and I knew that was it, I got frozen on that frame with the gulab juman in my hand. Literally, it was a miss between cup and lip. “ See! I am not saying this because I have to share my lunch with you, I am genuinely concerned with your pathetic situation. Could we do something for you ”. In a jiffy, I could see the faces changing their color from ridicule to atmost empathy. Was I hallucinating now: there were looking like those wild gladiators, who just had a great lunch and now all raring to kill without second thoughts. Silence was deafening me at that moment and I did not know how to get out of the situation and more so what to do with that gulab jamun , still stuck precariously in my shaking hands. I gulped that Gulab Jamun at once. I really did not have a choice with that.


“I know, my time is running out but so is yours. The lunch is over for today so let us have me as barbecue some other time.” , I showed everyone the big clock hanging above our head and ran away from the café before I could actually become a turkey for their after-lunch delight. Do not bit off more than you can chew: I learnt it the hard way today. Hope you will not repeat the same mistake.

Editor's Choice of Powers that be for 2009

Editor’s Pick of Powers that be for year 2009 :


1. Chachu: Leading the pack by miles - Did the Shehwag act by hitting another quick-fire T(S)on again… Long way to go Chahchu !!… There is still lot of fire left in the cylinders !!

2. Set W(V)et in blue waters of Mauritius …. Vendy got Bangaloored. “Kuch to Log Kahenge”


3. My Name is Khan: Our SAK is selected for next season of “Biggest Loser”. For a change, this 100 Kg Beast will not loose his weight in the show but share his miserable experiences on his Lac(k)e of opportunities from his PVR escapades in Delhi to Orkut debacles of sending numerous unrequited friend request to his dream girl.

4. Munna: Karnataka Government is felicitating him with the “Honeymooner of the year Award” for his path breaking exploration of Spiritual Honeymoon Circuit in Karnataka. Took his newly wed wife to whirlwind tour of 21 temples across the length and breadth of Karnataka for Honey moon in one night and two days package. Got 1 per cent cash back on his Canara Bank Credit card also … what a deal!

5. Bond: Ask him about his post nuptial learning: He grins and whispers with his tongue in cheek, “My Balance sheet does not matches these days. I am left with only assets now.” After all, how many of us hit the jack pot of NAV RATNA Bride. Luck you; you are also learning chemical engineering these days…

6. Anant “The Runaway Consultant”: This consultant took his assignment too literally. Ran away with the scarce resource of a small MFI on a very long capacity development programme. We all are so proud of you, Honey!!

7. Vermajee “The whistle blower”: He is the epitome of investigative journalism. Don’t know how he got such “in vitro” breaking news all the time. SMSed through out the year even to the "Proud Paas" about the arrival of new kids on the block.

8. Atul “The Refresher Boy”: The refresh key of his laptop has finally asked for VRS. The candy boy keeps refreshing his laptop thinking that his Face book account will be updated with the long awaited messages from all of his girl friends. Regretfully, the refresh key has long died and his account still waits for its maiden pop up.

9. Kumar Amit “Just Committed”: What else do u want to prove that God do exist? Even, he has entered into the proud league of “Just Committed” Legion. Dear Bhabhijee has been conferred the Godfrey Phillips Bravery award to tame this most notorious and wild D-Blockitte. Now days, he does not bite or bark just wags his tail.

10. Mishrwa “The Available Bachelor”: Basanti still is unrelenting and happy with her Dhannoin. Basanti has not one but three Mausis but neither of them have a water tank in front of their houses for Misherwa to repeat that spectacular “Veeru act”. Even the Gabbar has refused to ask this Basanti to dance on the glass shards. Misherwa’s Sholay has bitten the dust again.